"Hope sees further than reality will allow."

- Addiction diminishes hope as it disables the ability to see further than the next drink or hit.



"Confusion is fears attempt to limit possibilities." - J



"From my experience, the praying is the easy part. It's the listening to what you are being told that is more difficult. Don't cover an answer with more prayers." - S



Addiction makes unhealthy thinking seem familiar and the alcoholic or addict will begin to believe in this thinking as their only reality.


The Secret

The secret to sobriety is not letting a "?" turn into a "!". Along with this, be a "verb" not a "noun".
- T



"One could argue that confidence is some sort of chemical reaction in the brain, however mine was dependent on the half-life of the drug I was using." - A


Problem Solving

"We should remember that people reflect the extent of their own experience, not more. There are usually more solutions to a challenge than an individual can think of, no matter how experienced they think they are. Therefore, underestimation of available options in any given situation is common. Inspired problem solving involves going beyond personal first impressions." - E

- Recovery encourages you to challenge and check your thinking in all ways. Your preconceived notions must give way to more "inspired problem solving".



"Discover who I am despite my label and then maybe you will see me as I see myself. It is not being an addict that scares me but rather being nothing else." - M



"If you want change to occur, find out what disturbs people. When disturbed, people will be motivated to change."


Tainting The Prayer

"When I was trying to quit drinking, one technique I used was saying a quick prayer before every sip of beer. The more I drank, the more I prayed. It sounds crazy but the guilt of tainting the prayer with a drink eventually won and I stopped drinking all together." - K



"Making amends can't change the past but they can help the present by minimizing the impact of some regrets." - J


Memory Of Who I Am

"What complicated my drinking was the fear of losing the memory of who I am and who I am suppose to be. This realization really hit home when I started to look in my families eyes and couldn't recognize myself anymore." - D


Guiding Principle

"Being capable and competent doesn't mean the right choice will always be made. A guiding principle when choosing should be: Am I choosing this because of love or fear". - Noah


Whys And Hows

"In recovery I have slowly realized the importance of the questions I ask myself. It was a turning point for me when I moved from the why did this happen question to the how can I question. I've learned that the why question is pretty much only used to beat myself up with. Moving forward for me entails looking more at the hows not the whys." - Brice



"What I open my eyes to disappears, what I resist becomes stronger" -L

... This is similar to the recovery phrase, "we are only as sick as our secrets".


Status Quo

"It is not that the alcoholic doesn't hear you, they are just hearing things second hand." - J

"When drinking, everything is filtered through a haze of alcohol that will confuse any statement that attempts to challenge the drinkers status quo." - J



"I found that pain with a purpose can be overcome. Pain with no purpose hinders and hurts." - C



"Innocence is where there is no seeds of doubt...

..... I thought my innocence was lost forever after the abuse. I did not trust anything or anybody. I lost myself in drugs. But through recovery I am finding myself again. I am believing in me again and I am beginning to see innocence again. Innocence is never lost." - K



"He blames me so he doesn't have to feel." - C. (Wife of alcoholic)



"Be interested in character, not convenience." G.F.

Initially in addiction recovery, there is a selfish type of mentality that often causes decisions to be based on what is most convenient and not necessarily what is actually the best character building choice. Character choices often take a back seat to what is more convenient. If this is not resolved it could leave the person empty and could perpetuate a desire to continue drug or alcohol use.

To help differentiate which choices are for character and which are for convenience the person in recovery can ask the following question, "Will this act benefit me or someone else?" If the answer is that the act can help someone else it is more likely to build character, if it is to help yourself it is more likely for convenience.



"When I stopped using drugs I started to see that even though I still experience a lot of stress, overall the stress is less complicated in nature and doesn't have as much drama and heartache attached to it. I realize addicts complicate things, but I even complicated stress!"



Worry can be a way of distracting us from deeper truths. It can help us avoid looking at what must truly be resolved by making surface issues more immediate. Be careful if this becomes a focus in recovery as "addicts" have a way of manipulating (although unintentionally) others and themselves from knowing how they truly feel.



"It wasn't the unknown that scared me. I got good at staying up at night worried. It was his unpredictability that kept me focused and vigilant. This created a sense of closeness I thought was love." -B


A Goal

"A goal is only as good as the effort and pride put into the process of achieving it."

- There will be many ups and downs in recovery as you make your way toward sobriety. No matter what the outcome, make it a goal that when you look back on this time of your life, you can at least say you did it well and with pride.



"My serenity came when I finally realized that I could choose to drink but didn't have to." -FT


Passive With Regret

"I use to tell myself I'm laid back but I'm realizing I am actually 'passive with regret' and this is why the resentment continues to build. (Pot smoker with marital issues)



"I have come to realize that others are going to be exactly who they are regardless of my opinions or judgments of them. All that I influence is my behavior and response. When I was using I arranged life so that it would best fit my thinking. This was my world as an addict. Life had to be manipulated; otherwise I would see that my behavior did not make sense." - J.T.

.... Understanding this is key to understanding resentments.


Strength And Flexibility

"For sobriety and anger management I have started to view my brain like my muscles - needing both strength and flexibility for growth." (Greg - Recovering cocaine addict, bipolar mood issues.)


Impulsive Nature

"To combat my impulsive nature I have learned to pause with a prayer before reacting." - Judith



"The strength and hope I have struggled for and obtained in recovery still doesn't even come close to comparing to the love I never saw waver in my Mother's eyes." -K


A Chair Is Always Waiting

"A chair is always waiting in a room where a few do crowd
To tell your tales of living and to help you be strong and proud
It is a place that will captivate you with lyrics and truths for everyone
Its hope is to cleanse your spirit so you can right the wrongs you have done

The camaraderie of those who will be lingering in these halls where bravery is found
Will encourage and support you onward with a knowledge that is the best around
They won't leave, walk away or wander if your heart is ever closed or bound
There will be a chair always waiting in a room where a few do crowd"

- Alcoholic, AA member, sober 7 years